No Limits...

This is our lil secret... I had me a good ol' pity party. Maybe not even one, or two, or three... I've had a couple of them in the past few weeks. And while they've been "familiar" and my ego was pleased, I really didn't enjoy it like I used to.. This reminds me of the simple fact that despite how I feel and the challenges, I have to keep moving forward.

“The only limits in your life are those that you set yourself.” - Celestine Chua

I came across this quote that I've always known, however today it took on new life in my mind. Whether you agree with it fully or not, it does have some merit. You decide what you do or not do, I'm not even talking about excelling or not, I'm talking about having the guts to even try something.
There are so many ideas in my head that I've rationalized about, like this blog. There are so many thing I want to do that in my mind I decided I cannot do or that I think I would fail miserably at (Who does that? a fear of failure in my case).

Today just for all of fifteen minutes I took the limits off and saw a world greater than I could imagine. What was so major is that I saw myself in it! I could not contain my excitement! I'm a bit of a realist, so I know for sure I will not succeed at everything I attempt and success might by eventual, however I do owe it myself to follow my heart. You know how you get inspired unexpectedly and in the most surprising ways sometimes, yesterday I heard singer Sia's song Chandelier on the radio and the line "I'm gonna live like tomorrow doesn't exist" hit me like bricks! Why am I not doing this as often as I should? Giving my best to everything I do? Maybe swinging from chandeliers wont be my thing. But there sure needs to be some swinging going on over here, releasing the passions in my heart and soul. Living to the fullest. I've always been drawn to people who just do them and not care about opinions, but determined to figure it out on their own terms and I know now that it's because I secretly admired them and was seeking to give myself that permission.

Today October 31,2014, the end of #OVO (October's very own) my birth month, I will do more of the things I dream, that challenge me. I'm going to give it my best. Swinging from chandeliers aren't my thing, but if it's yours swing away and smile while doing so! No holding back. Give your all. No more limits.

I'm currently reading this book by Nick Vujicic. Really good read and quite inspirational. You should check it out it you haven't already.





One Love
God Bless

Metamorphosis...

I am so tardy for the party!!! C'mon smile! It's kinda cheesy but you know you wanna. :D I have had this post in draft for a month or so. I had blocks, lows and highs and made several changes...  There is always some force to press against to do what we really need/want to do. But the pressing through and getting it done inspite of, is where victory lies. So I decided not to scrap it. And finally here it is and as usual it is from my heart, as I grow more and more comfortable being openly vulnerable.

I find butterflies really fascinating and so I was searching for photos on the internet and became even more fascinated with the process they undergo to get to the beauty we see and admire. Metamorphosis is a really awesome process. The life cycle of the butterfly is one of those things that make me cheese so hard in awe and amazement of the level of intelligence the Creator clearly possesses.

The butterfly's life cycle consists of four stages, each stage beautifully designed and all necessary for it to transform from an egg to a beautiful butterfly.

To grow into an adult the butterfly goes through the following stages: egg, larva, pupa and adult. Each stage accomplishes a different goal. Caterpillars need to eat a lot, and adults need to reproduce. Depending on the type of butterfly, the life cycle of a butterfly may take anywhere from one month to a whole year.

Like the butterfly we go through various stages of change in our lives. Changes that vary in length of time and season. Outside of the more obvious physical changes. We also grow and develop spiritually, mentally, psychologically and many other ly-s.

As shared from the onset I'm on a journey although sometimes I don't think I am. Those are the times when the growth doesn't feel like growth but then it is evidenced in some way. Those times when my questions outweigh the answers (which is quite often). When most of my days look the same and the changes I yearn for seem extremely distant.

As I prepare for the birth of my baby, one of the most major changes in recent years. I feel I am caught in a tailspin. These darn emotional and physical changes do quite a number on a girl. I have to relinquish complete control of my whole life to this process whether I like it or not. So does the butterfly, the series of changes have to take place. It may not be pleasant, enjoyable or even welcomed but it has to be.

My whole life is being rearranged like that of the butterfly on many fronts. Some are scary, but like the butterfly I have to surrender. I have to surrender to the process to get to the promise of which I dream.

Some seasons seem that not much is happening, like the third stage of the butterfly's life where they form themselves into a pupa, also known as a chrysalis.  From the outside it looks as if the caterpillar may just be resting, but the inside is where all of the action takes place.  Inside of the pupa, the caterpillar is rapidly changing.

So it is with our lives, some of the most beautiful moments, experiences and changes arise out of moments where there appears to be a lull, like nothing is happening but if we only knew. God is busy molding us and shaping our lives into His will and often our answered prayers.

So enjoy your journey, your metamorphosis. You aren't alone for the ride.

One love.
God bless.

Big ups to: www.thebutterflysite.com for the wealth of information..

Transparent?

We often proclaim how transparent and "real" we are, but are we really?

Being honest and transparent is something that takes real guts. Rooted in our obsession with what other people think of us. We are all self conscious which is good and required in good measure (in my opinion). But how about the fact that we sometimes pretend that everything is A ok or perfect. Don't get me wrong, It makes no sense to walk around moping etc.. but I believe it's ok not to be ok sometimes and that it doesnt make you weak. Where we are weak or challenged is where Divine strength and power steps in.

So caught up in not showing our cracks and flaws, we pretend we don't need anyone. Truth is we do. We don't need everyone, worst of all people who mistreat us and fail to see the value and worth in us. But we do need each other. To form and maintain relationships that give life. Relationships where we can love and be loved. Relationships that bring out the best in us, while helping to bring about change because of it's sheer power and influence.

With that said here is my truth, I have always struggled big time with "appearing" vulnerable. I have limited my list of people I allow myself to be vulnerable with but even then it's to an extent. A lot of it is rooted in a fear of rejection. This makes me put up walls and different detection strategies. So I am on alert for the people in my space, if I sense any sign of withdrawal on their part I get a head start and beat them to the punch. This is no way to live. It's extremely time consuming and energy draining.

After much thought I realize a lot of it is rooted in the issues with my father which continue to this day. Being real, open and honest, not just about our victories but also our fears can be scary stuff. But living with an open heart is worth it.

I've been thrown off by a number of things recently and I haven't been trusting the process as I should. I've been preoccupied with circumstances and engulfed with feelings of hopelessness. But I'm slowly making a recovery. God is crazy faithful I will continue to say. When I feel overwhelmed and alone on my journey He finds a way to show me His all encompassing, unconditional love.  All praise be to Him, as He is the reason I'm still on this trail. When God is all you have you learn He is all you need. This is true for me.

If you can relate I pray peace for you on your journey. Make the necessary changes to get the results you want. Trusting God and the process is our only hope.

Today is Jamaica's independence so I'm gonna share this Bob Marley song that has been my tune of comfort recently.

Blessings and love to you and yours.

Who are you???

Who are you?
Are you who they say your are?
Are you defined by their words, actions, expectations or varying perspectives?
Are you even who you say your are?
Because sometimes your voice echoes the words heard repeatedly.
Words that aren't true,
Words that don't even come close to what the Creator said about you...

Are you enough?
Are you worthy?
Are you limited or limitless?
Are you free or bound?
Are you existing or living?
Do you not know that each breath is a gift, unwrapped with each inhale and lift of the chest?
I hope you know, I really pray you do, but just in case you have forgotten let me remind you...

You were formed in a warm,
cosy womb for less, more or equal to 40 weeks.
In a slow and deliberate process
He created a masterpiece fashioned in His image and likeness,
To work the good works of the Master.
You are HERE by design, purpose and on a mission.
You are never alone, your creator would never allow it, He says if you make your bed in hell He is with you...

You are love and you are loved.
Your smile has the power to change the atmosphere in a room,
Your presence here on earth means there is something only you can do.
On the days where you are tempted to forget just who you are or to discredit yourself.
Remember this: you are beyond definition, you are greatness personified and more importantly there is a King in you....

Love, peace and blessings..

Opinions...Sm-opinions..

                 

I don't know what your views of opinions might be (especially about you or your life), but for me I have walked a thin line between overvaluing opinions and not. I have also had the task of choosing which ones are important, where information I may need could be found.

I struggled because I sometimes either totally accepted or rejected opinions, so learning balance is still one of my greater life lessons. I had to learn, what applied to me or didn't and take it from there.

In my awkward years which unfortunately due to my immensely sad fear of rejection lead into my early twenties. I sometimes agreed with expressed opinions of me more than my own (still scratching my head).
I overvalued the opinions of almost all those around me and undervalued my own. Thank God I'm healed lol.

Not everyone deserves the privilege of speaking into your life or circumstances and even then you still have to employ a filter.  We sometimes give others way too much power, from small decisions like what we wear or how we do our hair. To bigger life changes such as when we get married, have children or where we live.

Culture and traditions has been allowed to dictate a lot of our do's and don'ts. And while they do serve their purpose in a number of scenarios, for some it proves a noose. Even when it doesn't make sense we do some things without even a question as to why.

Everybody knows and nobody really knows, so I'll take the gamble of learning how to walk my own path in the pursuit of happiness. Who says I have to do it your way? Who even says you are right? It may be right for you and wrong for me.

In my pursuit of unconditional love it started with Christ and myself. Unconditional love includes everything, the good, the bad and the indifferent.  My Creator knows all of me and loves all of me, who am I to do any different?

Opinions will always be a grey area I think. But I am trying to learn to walk this path my way, with God as my guide. Seeing myself as He sees me, knowing He created me as ME for a purpose and I don't need to do it the way often travelled to fit in with someone's opinion of how I should do what I do.

So cheers to the lifelong process of living, loving and growing... Freedom from opinions and being all YOU.